The Grump(y old man's) Stump (lectures)
I realize that I will be a grumpy old man giving stump lectures. In fact, it's my financial plan.
A couple of my closest friends have blogs on financial matters. On this subject, I truly am speechless. This is one of the (albeit few) areas in my life that I have no doubt people look at me and think, "Jeez, how dense can he be? This isn't that hard." But for me, it just never makes sense. I understand the basic idea of investing, but there's still a lot of acronyms I can't place. Sure, I'll still be comfortable; yes, I'd like to buy a house, make improvements, and buy/sell my way up to better houses and perhaps multiple properties; I also have no doubt I'll have a 401(b) (ASH, correct me if I'm wrong on that one) once I start my career as a professor.
But as MS and I were talking about on the drive back up from NOLA, being filthy rich and retiring at the age of 35 -- which I fully expect a handful of my friends to be capable of -- never appealed to me. I'd rather have a job that I love like a hobby and keep working till my death. And what better job to attain that goal than a college professor. I'd make a good curmudgeon.
Do I need a better financial plan than that? Well, here it is. I'm not sure how true this is -- as previously hinted to, I highly doubt it applies to my close circle -- but I think most people end up practically investing such that in their retirement years they're able to live on 60-80% of their pre-retirement income from investments. I heard that somewhere, but I can't cite it. Intuitively, though, it seems fairly close to real-world (i.e. not intelligentsia) goals. So my plan? To not retire. I know, sounds crazy. But think about my career path. Sure, I'll probably be without weekends for the next 10 years or so; an office in my place of residence will be a requirement. Publish or perish, right? But after all is said and done, once I've attained tenure, been department chair once or twice, chaired dissertations a few more than that, and given a few lecture tours through Eastern Europe (or, preferably, Eastern Asia), I can relax a little into the job. Because, without all those young-man's-game items, at the base of my career I have 15 hours a week at the job: 9 or so hours of class lecturing, 3 hours in the office, and a few hours here and there in meetings. But I'm going to be a fit, healthy, and vibrant old son-of-a-bitch. I have no doubt I'll make it up and down stairs and still have the cognitive capacity to teach, what will end up being predominantly the same material I've had taught for over half a century, well into my 90's. So by age 65 or so, my "retirement" will still consist of 100% my pre-retirement income without ever touching my investments (after all, I'll need to leave my 2.5 something of an inheritance, right?). Gotta love tenure.
So, to my money-savvy friends (and anyone else who wishes to comment) how's that for financial planning? Am I far off base?
A couple of my closest friends have blogs on financial matters. On this subject, I truly am speechless. This is one of the (albeit few) areas in my life that I have no doubt people look at me and think, "Jeez, how dense can he be? This isn't that hard." But for me, it just never makes sense. I understand the basic idea of investing, but there's still a lot of acronyms I can't place. Sure, I'll still be comfortable; yes, I'd like to buy a house, make improvements, and buy/sell my way up to better houses and perhaps multiple properties; I also have no doubt I'll have a 401(b) (ASH, correct me if I'm wrong on that one) once I start my career as a professor.
But as MS and I were talking about on the drive back up from NOLA, being filthy rich and retiring at the age of 35 -- which I fully expect a handful of my friends to be capable of -- never appealed to me. I'd rather have a job that I love like a hobby and keep working till my death. And what better job to attain that goal than a college professor. I'd make a good curmudgeon.
Do I need a better financial plan than that? Well, here it is. I'm not sure how true this is -- as previously hinted to, I highly doubt it applies to my close circle -- but I think most people end up practically investing such that in their retirement years they're able to live on 60-80% of their pre-retirement income from investments. I heard that somewhere, but I can't cite it. Intuitively, though, it seems fairly close to real-world (i.e. not intelligentsia) goals. So my plan? To not retire. I know, sounds crazy. But think about my career path. Sure, I'll probably be without weekends for the next 10 years or so; an office in my place of residence will be a requirement. Publish or perish, right? But after all is said and done, once I've attained tenure, been department chair once or twice, chaired dissertations a few more than that, and given a few lecture tours through Eastern Europe (or, preferably, Eastern Asia), I can relax a little into the job. Because, without all those young-man's-game items, at the base of my career I have 15 hours a week at the job: 9 or so hours of class lecturing, 3 hours in the office, and a few hours here and there in meetings. But I'm going to be a fit, healthy, and vibrant old son-of-a-bitch. I have no doubt I'll make it up and down stairs and still have the cognitive capacity to teach, what will end up being predominantly the same material I've had taught for over half a century, well into my 90's. So by age 65 or so, my "retirement" will still consist of 100% my pre-retirement income without ever touching my investments (after all, I'll need to leave my 2.5 something of an inheritance, right?). Gotta love tenure.
So, to my money-savvy friends (and anyone else who wishes to comment) how's that for financial planning? Am I far off base?
Labels: JBP
posted by J.B.P. at 10:08 AM
4 Comments:
Postis Scriptum: I have a rudimentary counter attached this site which I sometime check. One of the features is it tells you from where individuals were referred. For the most part, this is blank (in the case that you type in the address or have it bookmarked), but if you search through google for "divergent world" and then click the link, it shows up as such. In tone with my last post, I thought I'd share an interesting search engine fact: If you search for 'fruit loops scrambled letters', I'm the number one hit. I don't know, I found that pretty damn funny.
Silly JBP, Don't criticize me for retiring at 35 (maybe). We have the same aims, just different paths to getting there. We both just want to be around young people, teach, guide, and play. The major paradigm break I have from you is that I ENJOY doing crazy ass entrepreneurial things and coming up with ways to make money. 35 isn't really a marker for me to retire and sit around all day picking lint out of my belly button. It acts more as a sign post where I want to have accumulated enough capital to go pursue whatever crazy idea strikes my fancy. You just found your crazy idea that you wanted to pursue sooner then me :)
jeffery....
the only way that I truly think you are off base is your understanding of my definition of "retirement"... basically it means the point when gainful employment is OPTIONAL... knowing me... do you really think I'll actually retire???
nah... ill travel, paint, learn new things, have my own company... basically do whatever the hell I want, but in some form of work... that is basically my hobby... not too far from what you plan on doing for the rest of your life ;)
unfortunately i think i would shoot myself rather than be a finance professor, so getting my PhD seems a little silly for my personal path... I just have to get there in a different way
Yea! Comments!
Of course, tis bitter-sweet; I'm feeling quite abashed. I hope I didn't give the impression I considered my work-till-I-am-no-more plan was in some sense on a moral high ground. Don't get me wrong, I wish I could "retire" early; unfortunately, with the modest means of a professional student and a lack of comprehension of the economic machine, this is my plan B. Really, I was more or less seeking approval and, perchance, an indication that this plan for my future is in some sense sound. But I didn't mean offend or criticize.
And JMD, I have no doubt you'll be picking lint out of your belly button long before your 35th.
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